"I'm excited, you know. This is where I should have been like three years ago. But I think all good things come to somebody that waits."
-Albert Haynesworth, now Tampa Bay Buccaneers defensive tackle
...on the couch with a 5 gallon drum of cherry garcia. "This is where I should have been three years ago"? Wow. OK, Albert. Just go ahead and shit all over the team that paid you over $40 million to sit on your ass and demolish the buffet at Long John Silver's again and again. Pretty sure Red Lobster in D.C. had to cancel their "endless shrimp" deal while Fat Albert was a Redskin. Hey Albert, the ocean called -- they're running out of shrimp.
Let me say this in no uncertain terms: Albert Haynesworth is the lowest form of life that can exist in the NFL. He's in that deepest circle of NFL hell reserved for Jamarcus Russell and Ryan Leaf. He's spoiled, entitled, delusional about why he's been let go by three teams now, and if I thought hitting him with a truck would do anything other than lead to me having a truck with big bite marks in it, I'd drive an 18 wheeler into his mountainous gut. The sooner he retires, the happier I'll be.